as shared by Big

Penile erecto!

Yes, my man is really a little boy at heart.

Do you know anyone in your life who is always Ms Perfect? Mr Perfect? She who has to one-up everyone else in whatever she does.

I do.

And I feel not only irritated but sorry for her.

Because it must be tiring to constantly try try try and try to be Little Miss Perfect.

***

This blog was never written as a Ms Popularity attempt nor do I care about my readership stats by being Little Miss Sunshine all the time. I have my moments when I feel down, bitchy or nasty. And I don’t pretend that my farts smell like roses you know.

Yes, this is the real me. The nasty, the real,  the delirious, the happy, the pissed, the loved, the loving and everything.

I have been starting to feel mutinous lately. I just want to travel and get away. Sometimes I get this way when I am up to my ears with why why why questions, work, whatnots.

The kids are now at his place and in the desired silence and peace, I feel strangely discontented. I miss them and yet when they are around and clamouring for my time, I wish for some quiet.

I don’t know what I want and I suck.

Before we got Muffin, my kids would always bug me for a pet. Not the turtle/ fish variety as we had been through it and they, like me, HATE inanimate sort of creatures. But a dog would tire me out further (what with the walks and what nots) and I thought cats were aloof creatures (that was before I found out more about cats from Barffie, RN and Big.

So, during one of my sick turns of humour, I told the children that we could get a pet shit instead. Imagine! No trouble with feeding it, taking it out to play and showering it. We could have fun talking to it and making up the dialogue for it. Most importantly, no problems with the shitting as it is a piece of shit itself!

Needless to say, my children wondered why their mum is such a whackybat, Geanyne proceeded to protest quite violently and told me to “stop being naughty” and Germaine even borrowed some books from her school library to educate me.

Geez. Kids these days.

Last week when I steamed cod steak for the children, I also set aside some for Muffin. I wasn’t sure if she would like it but judging from the empty dish, she did.

Muffin has settled in quite nicely in our little family. She’s very obedient and affectionate. Normally she sleeps outside in the hall on the sofa or on the chairs in the kitchen. Her favourite spot though, is on our soft fluffy quilt on our bed and we usually let her, except during the night, when we close the door due to the airconditioning. Sometimes, she would protest by meowing rather piteously at the closed door, and when we let her  in, she would come in and cuddle with us.

There was an accident on the first night that she came. Geanyne opened the door to go to the toilet and Muffin, being playful, dashed right for the door. Geanyne was probably caught in a sleepy state and in shock, she tried to slam the door shut. The tip of Muffin’s tail was caught and she immediately started meowing very loudly. We were jolted out of our sleep and upon discovering, quickly released her from the door. Geanyne was crying in the room, thinking that Muffin wanted to bite her. Geez, we had two little ones to comfort. Explained to Geanyne that Muffin was only being playful and she should never try to close the door in that fashion again. Thankfully, Muffin was also not fearful or hostile from that incident. She is still the trusting and affectionate little muffin that she is.

I never thought I would make a good or willing pet ow ner due to my fastidious and neat freak nature but it’s so easy to fall in love with Muffin. It also helps that she’s also a very clean kitten and very well trained in toilet habits, thanks very much to Barffie and Jeff.

She was abandoned near their house and I am glad that we could do something to help.

In my last post about Germaine, I bitched about memory versus intelligence. See, I am not the type of mother who does flash cards and send my kids to all manners of enrichment classes. Not that they are crap or anything, it’s just not my style. Nevertheless, Germaine started to read when she was 4.

Anyway, my point is this. Do you think the big shots and entrepreneurs got to where they are by mugging? Memorising facts? Dead ringing ten year series?

Nope. I believe they journeyed along with creativity, an ability to think out of the box, street smarts and most importantly, intelligence.

My boss can’t remember his own schedule, his credit card numbers, his anniversary (!) and the likes, He needs me to remind him of such things. Me of the superior memory. And of course his earning capacity is many times of mine.

I look at the kiddie shows on television and they kind of sadden me. Spelling competitions, Brainiest kid (again, emphasis on memory of facts) etc.  Why don’t they have one where the kids have to come up with business ideas and compare profits? Or in case you think, shucks, she’s such a monetary bitch, then a show where they come up with practical inventions which they then have to build.

And the people in charge say that they are nurturing the children to think out of the box, to be creative, to be thinkers.

Gawd.

PS: We saw an ad on television the other. It’s about Oreo cookies. Three little girls poured the remains of milk into three glasses for themselves and tried to dunk the oreo. No go as the milk’s not enough. The first thought I had was, use a cup with a wider brim lah.. Ger went, what’s the problem, just pour the other two into the third one and all share that glass!

So it was.

Seems my daughter might be more intelligent than I am.

I didn’t bring my dad out as my folks hate crowds and they prefer to go next weekend when it’s not so “commercial”. Anyway, I don’t buy into the commercial notion of the “XXX Day” thing, with the exception of birthdays and anniversaries, where the particular date hold special significance. Any day can be Father’s Day or whatever day if the heart is there…

For another special “dad”, here’s what I cooked for him:

 Just a simple meal of pan-fried Salmon steak in dilled butter, lemon juice and garlic, and fresh produce with vinaigrette.

Thank you for being such a great dad to the kids.

I love you. 

Anna Sui Dressing Table Miniature

Gorgeous don’t you think?! It now resides on my office table, where I use it for my lippy touch ups.

I’m such a hopeless ku niang, I know.

Abso f**king lutely gorgeous ad

I recently had some pictures taken and I wish they could look like this. The colour texture, the direction.. the body.. hah!

At least I managed to get it done in monochrome tone. Nice.

VERY nice.