Teacher cum Prostitute
An Auckland primary school teacher is moonlighting as a prostitute. The woman, a mother of two children in her 30s, is new to teaching and moonlights as a prostitute to boost her income.
The teacher has apparently defended herself by saying that it was a private matter, and that prostitution was now lawful and legitimate work.
She apparently also told the principal he had no right to be the “moral police”.
**
I am quite disturbed by this piece of news because
- I am also a mother of 2 in my 30s
- I have dallied with the idea of going into teaching. What is holding me back is the 60% pay cut I will have to take.
- The thought of part time prostitution to supplement my income if I do take that 60% pay cut to go into teaching has never crossed my mind.
- I have a child in primary school and the thought of her teacher possibly moonlighting as a prostitute makes me uncomfortable.
- I guess I am unfashionably traditional and conservative.
Sometimes I lament how the phrase “moral police” is being misused and even abused to defend situations in which morals are clearly questionable. Is the guise of worldliness and sophistication being foisted to excuse a remorseless lack of morality?
As a teacher, not only are her personal values and integrity questionable, the sublimate impact on those she teaches must be examined.
Sending a message that prostitution is a legal and legitimate (and therefore even honorable?!) vocation is not a joking matter when it comes to young impressionable minds of the primary school going age.
Teaching is a noble and serious vocation in which responsibility, values and integrity should be deemed important to the incumbent. To taint it with prostitution reeks of a frivolous disregard for the very institution of teaching.
What do you think?
- Can you accept a teacher moonlighting as a prostitute?
- Can you accept a prostitute moonlighting as a teacher?
… ok i won’t go as far as to question one’s personal values or integrity, cos it’s her own business.
What if she’s really that in need of extra $$ for medical treatment or sth?
Does being a prostitute means she is unable to conduct herself in class professionally as a member of the teaching profession? There is definitely no strong evidence to suggest that.
The only explanation I can offer is that of public perception. The same reason why auditors cannot hold shares of their client companies.
I’m not saying it’s right or wrong, but if she can conduct herself in an appropriate manner, I dun see why the potential crossover/spillover influence. Of cos if u bring morality into the picture, then the dispute arises as the idea of education embeds certain notion of morals and values, which conflicts against that of the hidden trade.
Cow: Interesting alternative viewpoint.
The question is then - when she is a teacher and educating and influencing young minds, could it be construed as her own business?
It’s good you brought up the possibility of extenuating circumstances. I’ve read this book earlier - Call me Elizabeth by Dawn Annandale. It’s a real life account in which the protagonist was kind of “forced” into prostitution because of debts and family circumstance.
Strangely, I don’t feel the same need as in this case to question her personal values or integrity - and in fact, empathized with her. Why the difference?
I suppose in this case, one could say that it is truly her own business. She is accountable to no one but herself and her children. Teaching is a vocation that comes with great responsibility, accountability and public duty. When you are in charge of molding young minds, there will be a certain amount of almost unreasonable pressure and expectation of you.
A somewhat similar analogy would be that of a religious leader or a politician. Can we accept a religious leader or a politician moonlighting as a prostitute?
Nevertheless you have brought some very interesting points that are food for thought.
“Teaching is a vocation that comes with great responsibility, accountability and public duty. When you are in charge of molding young minds, there will be a certain amount of almost unreasonable pressure and expectation of you.”
<– +1. =)
I believe u hit the crux of the issue.
With great power comes great responsibility.
In this case, the power to mold those young minds and shape future generation is certainly something which deserves a substantial amount of accountability to match it.
I have no problems with such a scenario, as long as she is capable of conducting herself professionally as a teacher and at work in school. I think is also important that her night work does not affect her performance in the day as a teacher. Ultimately, imho, it is her personal choice and her needs and schedules that need to be balanced and prioritized.
Again imho, “morals” and “values” are a very sensitive and difficult topic in education. Should gay people be teachers? I believe so, but not everyone will agree. Should that teacher in a muslim school have been persecuted because she did not stop a student from naming a teddy bear “Mohammad”? I was appalled, but certainly the parents of the school felt strongly about it.
I know a lot of parents will freak out if they find out the teacher who is teaching their kids moonlight as a prostitute. If I’m placed in the parents’ shoes, I’m not exactly sure if I can accept it but I feel if she is a good teacher and can keep her private life apart from her day job, I don’t think it is a huge problem. Unless she start telling those kids about her moonlighting jobs or etc, then it’s a different case.
I do have a friend, R, who is a teacher who loves to club, smoke and drink. R even go for ONS but R is a good teacher. Every year, R is one of those teachers that received lots of presents on teachers’ day. Students adore and respect R as R does not look down on them at all even though they are from normal academic or normal technical class.
So if she can be a good teacher, students listen to her and able to get the correct knowledge. I don’t think it’s a huge issue. But you don’t find such cases in Singapore.
To those who advocate that the teacher’s private life is her own and has nothing to do with her profession being a teacher, I have these questions for you:
1. Your maid sells her body on Sunday. She takes birth control pills, does regular check-ups, uses condoms, is hygience, performs her duties as a maid in the utmost satisfaction for her employers.
Why are you still angry when you find out she is doing what she does on Sundays, even that Sunday is her time-off? Would you allow her to be near your kids? If not, why?
2. Your pastor or religious teacher who preaches against adultery is having an affair.
Pray tell me what are your thoughts?
3. Your mother (no offense) is a working professional in her mid-thirties. However one day you spot her picture in some adult site and you realised she has a second life to post her naked photos on the web. However she has brought you up well.
Yes I know you are proud of her as a mother for bringing you up well. But are you proud of her second life? Please do not misunderstand. I’m asking this simple question: would you tell your colleagues about her second life? If not, why?
So tell me how will the said teacher’s two children grow with knowledge that their mother, though having a proper profession as a teacher, nightlife as a prostitute?
4. Would you as a parent allow that teacher to teach your kids?
You see, we can advocate personal private life vs professionalism. But more often, we cannot handle the truth that we are moral-conscience beings and certain liberal thoughts and values just don’t cut it. Furthermore, there are responsibilities both as a mother and teacher which one cannot deny.
Kaffein
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You posed very thought provoking questions above.
Just like, you cannot call Mr Tan a crook! But, you may call a crook Mr Tan…. u know what I mean….
Hi Kaffeine,
I had initially written some of my thoughts on each of the questions you posed, but they all felt insufficient or too nuanced to do the issue any justice. I re-read your comments and it seems to me the bottom-line was simply about morality.
Here is my personal view on morality (I’m an atheist, btw): it tends to be relative, it tends to be fluid and it becomes a very complex interplay between balancing the needs of an individual with the needs of human society within the context of human nature. My overly-simplified (simply because I find myself dealing with exceptions all the time) approach to I believe is right or wrong is this: Has someone been physically harmed? Has someone been emotionally harmed? Has someone been treated unfairly? If the answers to the above are “yes”, then I think one needs to review and reconsider the “morality” of the situation and try to strike the right balance to allow us to keep going without feeling a great burden of stress on our psyche.
As a result, I tend to try to keep a very open mind about almost all things (a quick note: just because I said that does not mean I think everyone else is closed-minded). I consider it important to review and renew my thoughts and understand that a good number of things aren’t always simple and clear-cut. My mind does frequently become closed to a reasonable discourse on many things - things I naturally feel uncomfortable about even if another person would not. These are the things I would have to fight extra hard to reason through and review.
The case presented by Rachel is not cut-and-dried. We do not know the people involved, we do not fully understand the context. We do not fully understand their local framework of morality. It just occurred to me that in this teacher’s case, things have become more awkward since she has made the issue public. Now the children will probably know. Answers may have to be given, and given fairly and responsibly.
I still support the respect for a private individual’s life choices (in this case the teacher’s) where possible, particularly if it causes no severe direct harm to other individuals. Children are influenced not merely by their teachers. Very often, and in fact I would claim the majority of the time, they are influenced by their peers and their parents. My own experiences seem to bear this out. I do not think this teacher is actively promoting her moonlighting experiences to the girls in her class. My take is that as a parent, the onus is on us to pay attention to what our children learn in school and help them see and understand what they have encountered as accurately and responsibly as we can (because certain things, we cannot understand, even as adults).
Finally, to complete my ramble, consider the following: would it be moral of us to have deprived her of her day job in spite of her ability to do it well and professionally? Would it be fair? What has she done so far to our children? Has she really turned them into evil sexual deviants? Our children are “safe” but what of hers? What would she do? Will she be forced to become a full-time prostitute? Do we simply say “Oh, surely she can find something more savory to do!” and leave her to her own devices?
PS: Thank you all for bringing up such a thought provoking issue. Took me the better part of two hours working through, revising and contesting my own thoughts and my own feelings to try to distill them into words.
Hi Chee Wai,
Appreciate differing points/views. We may not always agree, but we can agree to disagree.
Well, alot of our ‘guidelines’ do come from our backgrounds, education, religious views, experiences, etc. Totally not an issue with thoughts other than my own. Whether one is an atheist or Christian, we are all accountable to someone (at least I believe so) - be it a higher being (God which I believea), or to yourself, your family and loved ones. Indirectly also to the government, society, etc. I shan’t go into details as they can be very boring but I believe you know what I mean.
Our actions do influence people especially when we are put at that level or position. We also have moral obligations. I use the term moral as in a kind of values, ethics and beliefs where we believe we are here for the better of mankind.
We have read so many accounts and articles of high level executives fired over a stupid sexual romp be it in the office party or on board a plane. I mean it’s after hours, non-work related and what they do are they own business. Why are they still fired?
Moral obligation and accountability to people.
Think Bill Clinton and why he said he was sorry. If I take your view, then Bill Clinton shouldn’t even apologise. I mean that’s his private affair between two consenting adults, president or not. But he did apologise, didn’t he?
Take it to a deeper level. Marriage - spouse and parenting role. Can you imagine telling my wife that my personal time are my private affairs and she should not care who I’m sleeping with?
It’s called moral obligation, responsibility, commitment, etc. Whatever. We are somewhat accountable to people who place their trust in us.
Yes perhaps there are real financial difficulties the woman is facing. Or maybe even medical conditions. My point is she is a mother with moral obligations to her children and also her students. I’m not saying she should resign her job, but hey, it’s like a phaedophile father who doesn’t allow others to touch his daughter.
I am commenting based on my understanding of the article. Maybe i might change my comments if more details are fed. I’m not condemning her, I’m asking her to rethink her life. Are things really that bad that she is driven to prostitution? Imagine again that one of her students found out she has been moonlighting as a prostitute. Does it not give this young mind a wrong impression to sell her body to get what she wants in life as long as one can separate personal and professional life?
In many accounts of counselling and also books written, even bible verses, sex is never about oneself. Each time you do it, you give a part of yourself away. Ultimately, where does it lead to?
Modified Paul Young’s song “Everytime we have sex, you take a piece of me with you”.
I hope this woman’s life follows the ‘Pretty Woman’ movie where she will meet a handsome, rich guy who loves her for who she is. But more often, it won’t.
Cheers,
Kaffein
Kaffein,
Lee Chee Wai has a simple approach. I quote,
“My overly-simplified (simply because I find myself dealing with exceptions all the time) approach to I believe is right or wrong is this: Has someone been physically harmed? Has someone been emotionally harmed? Has someone been treated unfairly? ”
I suggest you take a relook on his post.
etvwtd
Chee Wai :
Thanks for your alternative input. Although it runs somewhat contrary to my personal take, I tried to consider it from the angle and perspectives you presented. I find the exercise interesting and insightful into my psyche, values and principles.
And I certainly found the issues you brought up - the gay teacher and religious sensibilities extremely thought provoking.
Kaffein:
I am intrigued how you took the words out of my mouth when you cited those examples. LOL.
I guess as parents, we would somewhat have another plane of reflection in this matter.
Religion is definitely another catalyst.
Gracey: Thanks for sharing, my dear. Again, very thought provoking.
I agree with Kaffeine on the point of advising this teacher. I think it is reasonable to sit down and talk to the teacher about reconsidering her second job and trying to help her find an equally well-paying alternative.
Without having documented the lives of prostitutes in New Zealand (some Singaporean student here at UIUC actually interviewed a prostitute a number of years ago, I believe), I do not know how unsavory the environment is and how much danger she is exposed to. My opinion is that there is always some unsavory criminal element underlying the prostitution profession. The question is how well protected this lady will be in New Zealand.
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